asking myself if it was worth it to see my MIL if it means im coming down with pneumonia for the 5th or 6th time in my life.
like, its so hard not to blame her even if it isnt her fault. she took health percautions, and i actually got this cold from my own dad when he came to help me clean the house before she got here.
even though its not her fault im stuck on the "what ifs". like, did she HAVE to come in the winter during the yearly cold going around? did she HAVE to stay at our place and exhaust me further? is it possible if she didnt come that i wouldnt have been so run down and outside at the same time? if she didnt come over, my dad wouldnt have been over and gotten me sick, for certian. should i be more mad at my dad? how to i wrestle with this? and how to i not transfer my upset onto her? is that even possible? arrgh. just ranting.
By - clowncar2
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